Teach Me How to Mommy

The Oscars this year may have been controversial, but the one thing that was a no-brainer was that pregnant women rocked the red carpet. So since she is a model it's not really fair, but Chrissy Tiegen looks amazing.  Happy, beautiful, round and perfect.  It doesn't hurt that she has been wildly outspoken about using IVF to get pregnant.  Beautiful and brave - check, check.  We admire you. Emily Blunt, pregnant with her second child.  I guess it's possible to look even more beautiful after your body has already stretched, changed and birthed a child.  If I could hate you I would. She is not pregnant, but she is J-Law.  Any post about a red carpet has to include her.  Going to the hairdressers this weekend to get this hair-do.  Will it look good if I match it with a teacher cardigan and skinny pants? Red carpet time with my girl.  Her pick was Brie Larson's blue frock.  She wanted one Lucy's size and then...

We here at Teach Me How to Mommy love  a red carpet.   We love movies!   We LOVE Awards Season! The Oscars are our SuperBowl! Top 5 Oscar Moments we are excited about this year: 5.       J.Law Everything she touches turns to gold.  Literally.  Our spirit animal was still a teenager when she was nominated for her FIRST Oscar!  Can't wait to see her dress, and see her WIN! (we hope!) This.  <3 4.     Best Picture Winner The Martian -- Amy's pick for Best Picture.       The Revenant -- Colleen's pick for Best Picture. Editors note:  These are each the only movie we have seen this year.  #momlife  VS.   3.   Chris Rock  -- Host Extraordinaire              We really hope he's funny, but mostly we really hope he  points out the social issues that have  been plaguing the Oscars this...

This is the waiting room at the clinic Brian and I were at yesterday.  In reflecting (and in re-writing this post 3 times) I've understood that I don't need to re-hash the past, but I think it's worth talking about a bit... What upset Brian and I so much was the treatment towards the young boy who created the drawing on the board.  We watched his grandmother belittle the staff at the Urgent Care Center, and then belittle her grandson.  It hurt my heart.  He was so proud of his design, he had an entire plan for what he was creating, he used the word "suspension bridge" in describing the picture to her... and her response was "why are you even doing that" and "you are making a mess" and "you shouldn't do it like that".  He was not making a mess; he was playing nicely, he wasn't on a tablet or smartphone, he was being creative and was very proud of what he created! I was conflicted... do I say something...

Add this to my list of WTF Moments. Part I Friday night I thought I broke my ankle.  Thank god my Mom was here, because I fell, and I fell HARD.  She nursed me back to health with an ice pack and my favorite blankies, and made sure I could get up the stairs.  :)  Saturday morning -- I rated the pain a 9 out of 10 (if 10 = my birthing pain) My worries got the best of me... how would I get Colin from daycare if I was on Crutches.... Then -- I moved it in such a manner that I could not handle the pain any longer.  Brian brought Colin to my parents (he is way happier there than he is here anyways... He has an Auntie and a Fauntie to keep him busy) and came home to bring me to the Urgent Care for an x-ray.  The same Urgent Care, by the way, that I went to less than a week ago because my kidney pain was back with a vengeance (they said bye-Felicia by Wednesday).  How Embarrassing!!  Thankfully the Hot Doctor wasn't in yesterday --...

 This past week we got a bit of spring fever.  The sun was out, the snow has melted and it was warm enough to go out with less than 10 layers.  For Lucy this means short sl eeves and flip-flops.  We negotiated.  Getting to be outside gave me such a breath of fresh air (literally and figuratively).  An hour outside is an hour less inside of destruction, mess, boredom and Dora the Explorer.  I can't wait for when most days are nice and it's the sporadic few that suck.  February can be a bitch though.  Mid-week our neighborhood was filled with rain, sleet, freezing cold nights and even the loudest, scariest midnight thunderstorm I can remember.  Desperate times call for desperate measures.  Dinner time circa Thursday (breaking point) I brought the wagon inside and took the kids and all their stuffed friends for rides around the house.  It was enough to keep them busy for 5 minutes and then we had a picnic (food trumps...

Welcome to Wednesday. I got a text just as I was starting to gather my things to pick up Colin. This is what I got: Yup... That's my car... This is actually the "good" side.  The drivers side was water half way up the door! I climbed in the backseat, reached over and my prayed that the car turn on.   It was the longest moment of my life. NOT because of my car not starting (it took two times to actually turn over), NOT because my legs were soaked up to my knees, NOT because of the busload of students laughing at me (I'll remember that when you all ask me for extra credit at the end of the semester!!).... It was Mom Guilt. Mom Questions.  Mom Brain Overload! Here are some questions that crossed my mind as I ran in a FULL SPRINT across the front lawn of the school in the pouring rain....  What if I hadn't stayed later than usual to catch up on grading.. What if I wasn't (5 minutes) late this morning and had gotten a better par...

To the mom who manages to get her daughter dressed in a coordinated, fitted and ironed outfit every day.   I am in awe . To the mom who brushes her daughter's hair every morning.   I admire you. To the mom who gets her daughter's hair into pony tails, pig tails or intricate hair patterns with matching ribbons, clips and bows.   I'm at a loss. I've been taking notice of you and I need you to spread your knowledge.  I often give myself pats on the back for getting my kids safely and happily to "school" on daycare days and getting to work on time.  For me, this is a major achievement. Yet.... Just recently I have been taking notice of the other girls at daycare.  No lie...their hair seems brushed, tamed and pulled back.  They look together.  Their entrance proves that there was an effort put into their appearance.  It may go unnoticed to others, but not to me.  I am entranced. Lucy is an independent girl.  I love that about...

Whew!  What a busy weekend! This is as centered as Colin gets... scribbling on the waiver forms.... And yes... that is a Nirvana shirt...  because he's cooler than I am, and that's what rock stars wear! Colleen and I kicked off our Saturday morning with a little Mommy & Me Yoga session!  Our recent guest poster Kelly (you can read her post  here , and check out her blog  here ) invited us to her one day only CT class!  Colleen and I both though, yesss!  Babies and Yoga, what could go wrong..... oh wait.. we don't have babies...  so instead we brought our Toddlers. The other mommies and their gorgeous babies looked ethereal, centered, calm..... They were bonding, Kelly was effortlessly guiding them, and they were all graceful enough to laugh with us (we think) at the crazy kids we brought along.  The other mothers had babies under 5 months old... when they get bigger they will fondly refer to those months as...

Just this week I was "tied up."  The kids were not in eye sight, but I heard them.  Then all of a sudden I didn't hear them.  It could've lasted 30 seconds or 5 minutes, I don't remember, but all of a sudden I was like what happened.  Was one of them sitting on the other?  Were they half way up the stairs (in socks)? Were they playing in the bathroom (the worst possible scenario)? No they were 10 feet away from me and Lucy was reading to John.  By reading I mean explaining the picture (she's smart, but not that smart).  He was sitting in awe of her. (The details of them being only half-clothed and sitting on the ottoman are not important). I am sure many moms have had these moments.  I have too, but there was something about me not being present while it happened that made it that much more special.  They love each other even when I am not there (hovering).  True siblings.  Sometimes I think back to the time that Jerry and I...

Rather, winter has already been here, it just took till February for it to actually be painful. This weekend the temps in CT have been below 0.  So, even though we have been going outside throughout all of January, we have officially made it an indoors weekend here.  I'll be honest, even the thought of bundling them up for a few minutes of fresh air felt daunting. Sidenote :   Jerry and I got out this weekend and went to see The Revenant.  It was a beautiful movie (at times) and when I say at times what I really mean is when I was able to actually watch it and not hide my eyes in my scarf it was quite lovely.  It was quite possibly the most graphic movie I've ever seen, but I suppose it was realistic.  It showed one man's survival in arctic cold temperatures (with a broken leg and several exposed wounds).  I guess my point is that if I can't get motivated enough to bundle my kids to get into the car and this guy traveled hundreds of miles on foot (...

Both kids aren't feeling that great so the fun plans I had scheduled for weeks were dashed.  I'm on vacation, so I should've known that someone would be sick and we would be hunkered down for days. Anyways, thought that they were up to going to Barnes and Noble to get a book for vacation.  Forty dollars later, it was a good decision. Even though I waited around in the morning for potty time and breakfast, of course as soon as we walk in John had to go number 2.  No problem...I brought my backpack and I was all set to clean up and get back to running around the store and touching every stuffed animal possible before picking a book. The bathroom was gross.  Public restrooms are always a crapshoot.  For instance, I had to take Lucy to the bathroom and Stop and Shop once and it was like walking into the Four Seasons. Seriously...even the painting on the wall was that of an Italian coliseum.  Yet, Barnes and Noble - ugh, gross, dirty, smelly..nightmare. ...

A beautiful post from a dear friend, Kelly Peterson .  Enjoy all! After three months of exclusively being together, Gus and I parted ways as my maternity leave was over.  We  had gone to baby yoga, library story hour, to the beach, and on many walks! We spent our days playing, napping, cuddling, and occasionally doing housework. I never wanted this day to come, but I knew it was inevitable. I would go back to my second graders and Gus would go to daycare. Leaving Gus was probably one of the hardest things I have ever done, and I'll admit it, I spent 75% of my day crying (which was more than him but he cried a lot too). But you know what???? We both totally survived. My pediatrician once told me that the secret to parenthood is doing whatever it takes for your whole family to survive. Obviously within reason... I like to think of that when sleepless nights come, just survive.  This was the last picture of my maternity leave... Or the first day of school for the ...

My sister and Kelly are best friends raising best friends too. This week you will read a guest post from a new mommy, a true favorite of mine.  I have known Kelly Peterson for almost 30 years.  It can't be 30 yet because she's not 30, that's the only limiting factor.  Our mothers are best friends, therefore even if we didn't like each other our lives would be intertwined.  Luckily, she's a doll.  A truly lovely person who (luckily for the world) created a smaller, male version of herself a short time ago.  Gus is four months old and his nursery is "explorer" themed.  Kelly and Cole take his photograph next to a big stuffed broccoli and did I mention they named him Gus?  No, it doesn't get any cuter. Kelly is really talented.  She can re-do furniture, decorate homes, take photographs, make dream catchers, act and make people laugh. She's also a second grade teacher.   Exactly, she's one of those type of girls, except she's also real...

Snow days are perfect for eating cupcakes before dinner, and for  wearing two different socks Monday was another snow day for the Hayes household. Friday I took Colin to daycare, I needed to clean the house. Today, I just couldn't justify it.  Also, Brian was home too, so it would be easier... right? It wasn't that bad out, but neither of us could even justify changing into "real" clothes, so we hunkered down and weathered the "storm" indoors. I have no real transition to my story except that it happened...                              ----------------------------------- Brian was taking out the garbage and as he was lifting it from the garbage can he mentioned that it was leaking a little.  I was really annoyed at the fact that now I would have to clean the garbage can out.   I don't really believe in "boy" jobs and "girl" jobs.   But   you have to under...

You know when people ask you that question, "If you could be anyone else other than you who would you be?"  Well it never takes me even a second to reply. Beyonce . I'd be Beyonce.  She is a goddess.  She is beautiful and talented and a mom.  Add in the fact that she is rich and famous and you have basically detailed my wildest dreams. I may have been the only person who didn't know that Beyonce was going to be part of the half-time show last night.  But I was damn happy that the only real part of the game that I watched with any intent was the time she shared the stage with Cold Play (who I also love). I love her for all that she represents including a body that is real .  Really f*ing hot. I workout to "Who Run the World" (isn't the answer obvious?) "Boy you know you love it. How we smart enough to make these millions Strong enough to bear the children Then get back to business." Her grammar may not be in check, but ...

My husband and I aren't allowed to play cards with each other anymore.  More specifically, in order to stay married and carry on with our vows we can never, never play rummy again. We are both really competitive.  He is more so (he'd admit it too), but I am not meek - I like to win. After we first start dating we realized that playing cards and a few other things (like that time he tried to teach me to golf) just were not for us.  The final straw was when he accused me of cheating after I finally (outright) beat him at rummy.  I was fuming - like I'll dump your ass if you say it again kind of mad.  Instead, we just agreed to not compete anymore. Everything has been going really well.  I mean we have been together for over 12 years..something must be working. Oh, and I figured out what's working.  We DON'T PLAY GAMES with each other...like ever. Until we both got fitbits . I really love my fitbit.  It's the small recognition I get for j...

We have heard from many of you who read teachmehow2mommy.  Thank you for reading, thank you for the feedback, thank you for continuing to click.  We do this because we love it and because it's the best form of therapy stress-relief we can find. We hope you keep reading and sharing.  We have a lot of things coming up - including a few blogs from our very own husbands.  We also have a few guest bloggers ready to share some really amazing stories. Below we have chosen a couple of our favorite "old" posts. Things I'd Thought I'd Never Say  - Becoming a mom of a toddler When You Send Your Husband to the Store   - A waste of time Teacher Mommy  - Balancing it all Getting Real - An unfiltered guide to new momhood In case you missed them check em' out.  New content out this weekend and lots for next week.