Teach Me How to Mommy

Amy is the first person I talk to when my husband is really on my nerves.  She keeps it real (although almost always agrees with me).  I return the favor.  We are keeping each other happily married. For the record there isn't much to complain about, but I feel (or hope) that everyone needs an outside person to bitch to about their significant other.  I mean, I know Jerry doesn't want to hear all my gripes, so why not Amy? Yet, then he goes and does something like this... Lucy just turned five (cue tears), which means the world of recreational sports is at her finger tips.  In our town she can play softball.  We thought it would be fun and she was open to it, so down we went on registration day and signed our little girl up for "Softies." As is the case with most towns my husband was approached to volunteer.  His immediate reaction was yes, even though he has a stressful job and a new baby.  I was so proud. Yet, the kicker?  A wee...

It's been awhile since I've written.  I have had lots to write about, but no time.  The holidays often feel like the best marathon I've ever run (I've never run one) you push, push, push until the big day is here.  Then once it's done you need a few days to recover.  Our holiday season was all of that and more.... But last night I took down the Christmas tree.  My parents wanted to take the kids for a sleepover (umm, YES) and instead of going out my husband and I stayed in and did an overhaul of the entire house.  To be fair we did go out on two dates this week, so don't feel bad for us. We had already organized everything, but to be honest every time I started a project this week I would get one step done and then the kids would have created another project (mess) that I'd have to address making me at least ten steps behind my original place. I usually don't take the Christmas stuff down until New Year's (or the day after).  But this year I a...

Just before my baby turned three years old he made it known that (until January) he is definitely still my baby. Today John turned three.  Three seems old, and at times he really seems it. He doesn't need me to play with him all the time.  I don't need to hold his hand when he's approaching a dangerous activity (he does it without permission anyways).  He even tells me sometimes often that he doesn't want my hugs.  He even (just this week) lost, albeit by accident,  the stuffed animal that he totted around for about 6 months.  "Tiggy" who was captured in every summer picture (including professional) this year, has magically disappeared.  We can't find it and instead of crying about it, John has taken it like a man (or at least a 6 year old).  That's right he is still going to sleep at night and going to school in the morning - all without Tiggy. Yet, he's not off to college either.  He's had three years of being a baby and he's not givi...

So this week my three year old turned four and my two year old got bunk beds.  No exaggeration there, it's just how my week is going.  Lucy was once three and now she's four.  Rather, she was once a baby in my arms and now she's a running, jumping, flipping, dancing, chatting four year old.  It's hard accepting the inevitable, but I think it's going to be a magical age. Right and so sometimes you mention to your father-in-law that having bunkbeds would be so fun for his grandson.  Then sometimes that same father in-law digs out his own son's bunkbeds from the early 1990s.  He then refurbishes and delivers them shiny, new and sturdy... They are awesome and we are so lucky.  I thought it would take some adjustment for John.  You know, still yearning for his crib - not yet ready for a true big boy's bed.  Yet for five nights straight he's slept cozily in his bunkbed cave.  His crib has been cast aside and serves him only as a ...

I know it's important to "make the time".  I've been working on it all summer.  But what if time is kind of running out (or at least running low). Recently anyone I come in contact with asks the big question "When is baby number three coming?" Wait, just joking (no one EVER asks that).  It's: "When do you go back?" It's soon ok.  It's Monday.  It hurts when I have to talk about it, but thanks for asking. Instead of wallowing, I've been squeezing every good minute out of this week.  We've done lots of fun stuff and then also some regular stuff, but we've done it all together.  I've noticed that Lucy has gotten just a bit more special attention this week because of the nature of some of my errands (haircuts, etc.).  So, on this night I told Jerry I was taking out our son and we would be back when we would be back.  I said bye to my favorite girl and headed out with no plan. We just ended up at the park, a perf...

Today I had just enough time to watch a grocery cart swiftly crash into my car.  Technically I had more than enough time to stop it.  In fact, it was kind of walking parallel to me, but then picked up speed and SMASH. The reason I couldn't stop it (even though it was bright green and headed for my shiny black car) was because I was holding 5 bags of groceries and two little people's hands. I went to the local grocery market so that the kids could both get their little carts and make a quick stop fun.  Ok fine, quick stops don't happen anymore, but they did have fun. I didn't want them bringing the carts in the parking lot, because that would be a disaster (both managed to tip them over in the store a total of three times). So I thought I could grab it all.  I didn't anticipate Lucy wanting to hold my left hand.  It was a really big deal to have the left hand - you know that one I had carefully balanced all the groceries on so I was frazzled when we walked ...

Bachelorette on far right! In a few days Amy and I (and others) are escaping to the Cape for a girl's weekend.  Let's call it what it is a bachelorette party ! We are celebrating an amazing friend, one who we've known for well over 20 years.  A fellow girl scout who is truly selfless - beautiful in every way imaginable.  We are hoping some giggles and booze will help the memories, stories and squabbles surface in fits of dance and instagram posts. I've been excited for this for a long time, but it just dawned on me tonight that it will be the first time that I will be away from kids by myself.  The few times I've been away (for weddings or dates) Jerry has always accompanied me.  We were in it together.  We missed them together and had fun together.  Once when I cried, Jerry told me how much I deserved a night away.  He was right and I tried really hard to have fun (and I did!). Jerry will be great.  Maybe part of him is glad to have ...

Just this week we have had lot of visitors.  Some visitors were scheduled (Nana and Uncle Justin) and others were surprises - neighbors and friends. In general I am not the biggest fan of surprise visits.  I am a planner (teacher much?) and so when I am caught off guard I am not at my best.  I got worse when I had kids.  If a visitor came when they were napping I nearly had steam coming out of my ears.  Yet, having kids also forces you to become flexible, so I often sometimes go with the flow. The visitors this week have brought such joy to my home.  A visit by Uncle Justin made John into a temporary cuddle monster.  He doesn't readily go to other people that aren't, well, me.  Yet when Justin drove up in his BIG diesel truck he was a puddle of hugs.  Justin's visit is another story altogether - I'll share when I am ready to embarrass myself (which also may be NEVER) . Unfortunately, every time someone came over my house this week my ho...

Lucy and John are at the stage where they are starting to fight.  It's kind of cute at the beginning, and then turns immediately un-cute.  Since they are of different sexes I don't have anything to compare it to.  When my sisters and I fought we used really hurtful words until one surrendered.  Sure maybe there was some hitting when we were young, but we knew exactly what to do to get the other one to stop (insult them) . Sidenote - Once you tell your sister that she is adopted and that's why she looks different then there is really nowhere else to go from there (that "she" was me and I am still a little shaky on my heritage).   These two are different.  John is very VERY physical.  I have seen him hit, pinch, slap, push and kick his sister.  It's a cross between not being able to communicate how he wants and being instigated by his sister.  We've had lots of chats and time outs and overall he is doing so much better.  Lucy's no...

This has been my first full school year in awhile.  Back to back babies got me used to maternity leaves (I'm starting to get the itch again, haha).  Well school is just about over and eight years later, I am still learning. It hasn't been an easy year, but I know in the scheme of things that I have it pretty good. This I learned: 1.  Tardies, sudden absences, leaving early... I used to look down on other people who seemed they couldn't get it together.  Like, just get to work on time...get dependable childcare.   GET IT TOGETHER ! Well, I am organized, prepared and have dependable childcare and I was still late this year.  I also had to call out last minute (twice).  I also arrived at school just to immediately turnaround and go back home.  I've had to leave early and I've had to get creative.  Even with great help it has been a trying year. Everyone's got their own circumstances and this mama is never judging again. 2.  Found t...

The vacation I (and teachers and students) worked so hard for is quickly coming to a close.  This week has been equal parts fulfilling and trying .  After the whole family recovered from the stomach bug and the weather decided to catch up to normal it has been wonderful.  No more puke, brings on a lot less whining and my kids are beginning to act like themselves.  There was a point (Tuesday afternoon) that I thought, how will I do this all summer?  Literally, how could this possibly work?  Why have I heard "Mommy hold me" 10000000000000000000000 times before 10 am rolled around?  Why have I cleaned the same area 10000000000000000000000 times only to see it worse the next time?  Turns out half of that is just normal behavior (at least for my kids).  But also, we were all still sick, exhausted and cranky.  It was pouring rain and still cold and we were just getting our appetites back.  I was going to throw in the towel that day ...

Just this week I was "tied up."  The kids were not in eye sight, but I heard them.  Then all of a sudden I didn't hear them.  It could've lasted 30 seconds or 5 minutes, I don't remember, but all of a sudden I was like what happened.  Was one of them sitting on the other?  Were they half way up the stairs (in socks)? Were they playing in the bathroom (the worst possible scenario)? No they were 10 feet away from me and Lucy was reading to John.  By reading I mean explaining the picture (she's smart, but not that smart).  He was sitting in awe of her. (The details of them being only half-clothed and sitting on the ottoman are not important). I am sure many moms have had these moments.  I have too, but there was something about me not being present while it happened that made it that much more special.  They love each other even when I am not there (hovering).  True siblings.  Sometimes I think back to the time that Jerry and I...

Rather, winter has already been here, it just took till February for it to actually be painful. This weekend the temps in CT have been below 0.  So, even though we have been going outside throughout all of January, we have officially made it an indoors weekend here.  I'll be honest, even the thought of bundling them up for a few minutes of fresh air felt daunting. Sidenote :   Jerry and I got out this weekend and went to see The Revenant.  It was a beautiful movie (at times) and when I say at times what I really mean is when I was able to actually watch it and not hide my eyes in my scarf it was quite lovely.  It was quite possibly the most graphic movie I've ever seen, but I suppose it was realistic.  It showed one man's survival in arctic cold temperatures (with a broken leg and several exposed wounds).  I guess my point is that if I can't get motivated enough to bundle my kids to get into the car and this guy traveled hundreds of miles on foot (...

Sometimes you hit it just right. On a whim Amy and I met at the local trampoline park for a play date.  We brought our husbands (ok, they brought us).  All kids felt well and even though the line was hella long, we got in and had a blast.  The only reason I am even typing this right now is because my kids are knocked out (jumping, running, balancing, falling, sliding, and free-falling = an awesome nap). Even though it took Colin a few minutes to love it (which he did) and Jerry and I got "talked" to for numerous rule infractions, it was a great time.  There were no injuries (parents included) and the kids left red-faced and smiley. I only had to hold back once from knocking a kid out.  That's a record...

Amy's post reminded me that I have a book that I purchased in preparation for a long, cold winter.  Knock on wood we have been lucky.  The kids and I were outside throughout much of December and only now (Februaryish) do we actually have snow on the ground.  I will take this weather any day.  Flashbacks of last year make me shudder. Anyways, I bought this book "The Toddler's Busy Book."  I breezed through it when I didn't quite need it (fall) and then I forgot about it.  It's hard to remember all those good things you do.  Like when I went on a rampage hiding Christmas toys for days in hopes of retrieving them on days that the kids got bored.  I still can't freaking find them all.  When I was pregnant I definitely walked around with my brain not connected to my body.  I thought it was hormonal.  I do similar things now but can't blame it biology..now it's just "mom brain." I just looked through it again and I am bit relieved b...

Sundays really can be fun - well, when you know you don't have to work tomorrow... Got the kids together for a play-date at Auntie Amy's house.  There was minimal fighting, no whining, no injuries and only one explosive near-tragic poop issue.  All in all, the world's best Sunday morning. For the record our husbands either went to church (Jerry) or went grocery shopping (Brian).  Put a feather in their cap because they killed it today too. Hoping everyone is enjoying today whether they work tomorrow or not! #ThankGodfor3dayweekends #Agoodday I swear they had fun - present mug shots not included.