Teach Me How to Mommy

This picture doesn't represent his usual state, but for some reason I love it.  Lucy and I tried to trick him by getting him all sleepy in the car and then transferring him into his crib at Memere's.  15 minutes later he woke up and didn't know where he was.  Since I was in the pool it took a few minutes to get to him.  When I walked in the look on his eyes was of pure devastation.  It was as if I had given him up for adoption and his new family hated him.  He was sad and angry and it didn't let up for awhile.  It was sad, but kind of funny. I talk a lot about how different my two children are.  Often, I realize that it insinuates that Lucy is somehow easier than John.  She always slept better, she appears to need me less and (with the exception of a few brief phases) she listens and wants to be good.  I could say the same about John on many days, but he does seem to need and want me a bit more than Lucy - he always has.  He can be clingy and whiny and he has already

Rhode Island has been a sanctuary for my family and I for as long as I can remember. The beach is literally at our finger tips anytime we want it!  Ice Cream, Bagels, Coffee.... a warm summer wind. The bonus to heading to Rhode Island is that Colin loves visiting his Grammie and PapaLou.  He'd sit next to his Papa forever, and follow him around, and tell him stories about chickens.... As wonderful and full of memories this trip was..... This trip was challenging for me.  Colin went on a sleep strike.  He usually takes a little bit of time to get down anyways, but this was full blown I WILL NOT SLEEP.  The nights we were there, it was 11:30 before his body finally shut down and he collapsed in my arms.  It's frustrating for me because I require those precious few hours at the end of the night to unwind, and I felt like I had done everything right up to that point to have a smooth nap/bedtime.  He was just too excited, to amped up, and I was too tired to give up and just let

Recently, Amy and I have been talking about our comfort zones and how they have been shattered (purposely or not) this summer. 5 minutes into our visit and my anxiety is through the roof. Markers on Nana's new deck. AHHH! I am working on being a little more impulsive .  Instead of having everything scheduled for the kids, I am trying to go with the flow.  Hence, this week I decided to pack a few bags and bring the kids to the beach.  Of course I am lucky to have a place to go (thanks Mom and Dad).  I packed enough for a few days thinking if it goes well we will stay, if I get too tired or things are too hard I can leave. I have a lot of pride so escaping was never really an option, but boy I came close.  The kids started pushing the limits immediately.  What can I climb?  What snacks can I pillage? Where can I run off to?  And, of course the ever popular how late can I stay up? With Jerry these questions and rebellions are easily managed.  By myself? Not so much.  I foun

Last week............. was it that long ago already??? There are no words to describe the amazing weekend we had celebrating Alissa..  Pictures... yes.  there are lots and lots of pictures but since most of the weekend was dedicated to snapchatting, it's probably good that most of that evidence is "deleted".   There was rarely a moment where a drink wasn't in our hands, a snack was never more than a few inches from us, and a song was ALWAYS being belted out at FULL volume.   Everyone was smiling, happy, carefree, uninhibited.... Here are a few of my favorite memories: 1)  Snapchat that! Colleen and Snapchat might be dating... we're not sure... because every time we looked over she had a different devilish grin, and soon 5 snaps arrived to our phones.  Girlfriend was on FIRE this weekend.  She reaallllly was the Kylie Jenner of the Cape!  There were so many snaps I couldn't keep up, and I mean that in the best way possible!  Secret

Fresh off a fantastic weekend with beautiful friends (new and old).  We were gone for less than 48 hours, but I felt like I was on a different planet.  Sure we were in Cape Cod and not Mars, but it felt like a brief stop in time (or during many moments a flashback to my "old" life). These are my top 5 reasons why it is still ok for a 32 year old to go to a bachelorette party and really (REALLY) let loose. 1.   We went to the beach all day, which isn't a rarity for me, BUT it was with adults only.  I was able to relax and do the beach how I used to.  Instead of sand castles and umbrella time, I swam in the waves, had a beach drink and tried to nap.     I read more of my book than collect shells (but I still did both). 2.  I didn't drive the entire weekend. No car seat buckles and no kiddie snacks, no mediating and no toddler tunes.  Better yet, no pressure (safety, caution).  I left that to others.  Mostly to Meg for driving Amy and me down (love you Meg) but

Today I had just enough time to watch a grocery cart swiftly crash into my car.  Technically I had more than enough time to stop it.  In fact, it was kind of walking parallel to me, but then picked up speed and SMASH. The reason I couldn't stop it (even though it was bright green and headed for my shiny black car) was because I was holding 5 bags of groceries and two little people's hands. I went to the local grocery market so that the kids could both get their little carts and make a quick stop fun.  Ok fine, quick stops don't happen anymore, but they did have fun. I didn't want them bringing the carts in the parking lot, because that would be a disaster (both managed to tip them over in the store a total of three times). So I thought I could grab it all.  I didn't anticipate Lucy wanting to hold my left hand.  It was a really big deal to have the left hand - you know that one I had carefully balanced all the groceries on so I was frazzled when we walked out

Bachelorette on far right! In a few days Amy and I (and others) are escaping to the Cape for a girl's weekend.  Let's call it what it is a bachelorette party ! We are celebrating an amazing friend, one who we've known for well over 20 years.  A fellow girl scout who is truly selfless - beautiful in every way imaginable.  We are hoping some giggles and booze will help the memories, stories and squabbles surface in fits of dance and instagram posts. I've been excited for this for a long time, but it just dawned on me tonight that it will be the first time that I will be away from kids by myself.  The few times I've been away (for weddings or dates) Jerry has always accompanied me.  We were in it together.  We missed them together and had fun together.  Once when I cried, Jerry told me how much I deserved a night away.  He was right and I tried really hard to have fun (and I did!). Jerry will be great.  Maybe part of him is glad to have complete control?  (Care

It's Friday night.  My husband is beat from a long week of work and I am beat after a long week of being home with the kids.  Time to drink a glass of wine blog. I've realized that at night (when everything is quiet and I can have what I want on the tv and peruse the photos of the day), everything seems perfect.  Like, phew that was an amazing day.  Yet, while you're in the throws of it, sometimes it's hard.  When your kids don't listen or you're tired and already drank your coffee, some minutes can be lonnnggg. So looking back I see a trail of things I did to get through with a smile.   1.   Bribery - If you're really good at the dentist you can choose a special treat at the "donut store."  Half vanilla sprinkles and half strawberry sprinkles?  Sure girl - you deserve it! 2.   Planning - Spent close to an hour cleaning, organizing and preparing the kids' playroom.  I set up zoos, farms and this castle filled with different animals do

On the way back from Maine I asked my husband if we could consider changing our life plan.   "Would you be open to moving to Maine?"  I said it in all honesty (albeit I didn't think it through).  The answer wasn't what I wanted to hear, but below you'll see why I asked. If you read my previous post you know my family and I embarked on a journey to northern Maine.  I make the distinction because we went so far in Maine that I was shown the Canada border.  The reason I plugged out (for the most part) for a week was because there wasn't much service to get anyways. Jerry's grandfather (Pepere) has a house on a lake there.  To say it's beautiful is an understatement.  The air smells different, the trees double ours in size and quantity and it is a normal activity to look for moose, deer and bears. Television, organized kid activities and parks are not really the recreational choices up there.  Seemed to me that swimming, boating, fishing, quading a

No, honestly, did today reallllllllllllly have to be the day I wore my bright yellow faculty shirt with my NAME on it???? ----------------------- After lunch today I decided we were going to the library. It was nearing nap time -- the worst time to head out of the house, but I have been determined to get Colin more accustomed to the library environment. Third Times a Charm right??? See when we're at the library, there is VERY minimal reading happening.  Colin see the stacks of books as raceways, and RUNS as fast as he can UP and DOWN while I grab books at random and hopes he likes them when we get home. There weren't too many people there today, and no other toddler aged kids, so this seemed like a win right from the start! I did manage to complete two puzzles while Colin threw, like actually THREW, all of the plastic farm animals across the play area, and we did get a chance to play on the "special"  Ipads -- we played a Sesame Street App, a Grover App,

I am fresh off a wonderful trip to Maine.  More on how full my heart is later.  For now, let's just quickly recap how awful a 9 hour car ride can go, even when you plan everything right. For the record Jerry was nervous about the drive.  I naively assumed all would go well. Since it was a 9+ hour drive we wanted to maximize the kids' sleep/nap time.  Sooooo, Jerry and I woke up at 2:30 am.  The car was packed so we scooped up last minute things and attempted to transfer the kids peacefully. That damn milk cup. The kids were so excited that they got up and stayed up.  They wanted to know when we were "at Maine."  John chugged a milk cup about 4 hours too early, but who cares, right? Well, apparently we should have.  He puked it all up within the first hour of the car ride.  That's right, milk puke on him and the car seat. We cleaned up as best as we could in the dark, at 4am, off an exit ramp with no stores open. After 7 hours of torrential downpour