Teach Me How to Mommy

This picture doesn't represent his usual state, but for some reason I love it.  Lucy and I tried to trick him by getting him all sleepy in the car and then transferring him into his crib at Memere's.  15 minutes later he woke up and didn't know where he was.  Since I was in the pool it took a few minutes to get to him.  When I walked in the look on his eyes was of pure devastation.  It was as if I had given him up for adoption and his new family hated him.  He was sad and angry and it didn't let up for awhile.  It was sad, but kind of funny. I talk a lot about how different my two children are.  Often, I realize that it insinuates that Lucy is somehow easier than John.  She always slept better, she appears to need me less and (with the exception of a few brief phases) she listens and wants to be good.  I could say the same about John on many days, but he does seem to need and want me a bit more than Lucy - he always has.  He can b...

Rhode Island has been a sanctuary for my family and I for as long as I can remember. The beach is literally at our finger tips anytime we want it!  Ice Cream, Bagels, Coffee.... a warm summer wind. The bonus to heading to Rhode Island is that Colin loves visiting his Grammie and PapaLou.  He'd sit next to his Papa forever, and follow him around, and tell him stories about chickens.... As wonderful and full of memories this trip was..... This trip was challenging for me.  Colin went on a sleep strike.  He usually takes a little bit of time to get down anyways, but this was full blown I WILL NOT SLEEP.  The nights we were there, it was 11:30 before his body finally shut down and he collapsed in my arms.  It's frustrating for me because I require those precious few hours at the end of the night to unwind, and I felt like I had done everything right up to that point to have a smooth nap/bedtime.  He was just too excited, to amped up, and I was too tir...

Recently, Amy and I have been talking about our comfort zones and how they have been shattered (purposely or not) this summer. 5 minutes into our visit and my anxiety is through the roof. Markers on Nana's new deck. AHHH! I am working on being a little more impulsive .  Instead of having everything scheduled for the kids, I am trying to go with the flow.  Hence, this week I decided to pack a few bags and bring the kids to the beach.  Of course I am lucky to have a place to go (thanks Mom and Dad).  I packed enough for a few days thinking if it goes well we will stay, if I get too tired or things are too hard I can leave. I have a lot of pride so escaping was never really an option, but boy I came close.  The kids started pushing the limits immediately.  What can I climb?  What snacks can I pillage? Where can I run off to?  And, of course the ever popular how late can I stay up? With Jerry these questions and rebellions are easily manage...

Last week............. was it that long ago already??? There are no words to describe the amazing weekend we had celebrating Alissa..  Pictures... yes.  there are lots and lots of pictures but since most of the weekend was dedicated to snapchatting, it's probably good that most of that evidence is "deleted".   There was rarely a moment where a drink wasn't in our hands, a snack was never more than a few inches from us, and a song was ALWAYS being belted out at FULL volume.   Everyone was smiling, happy, carefree, uninhibited.... Here are a few of my favorite memories: 1)  Snapchat that! Colleen and Snapchat might be dating... we're not sure... because every time we looked over she had a different devilish grin, and soon 5 snaps arrived to our phones.  Girlfriend was on FIRE this weekend.  She reaallllly was the Kylie Jenner of the Cape!  There were so many snaps I couldn't keep up, and I mean that in the best way possi...

Fresh off a fantastic weekend with beautiful friends (new and old).  We were gone for less than 48 hours, but I felt like I was on a different planet.  Sure we were in Cape Cod and not Mars, but it felt like a brief stop in time (or during many moments a flashback to my "old" life). These are my top 5 reasons why it is still ok for a 32 year old to go to a bachelorette party and really (REALLY) let loose. 1.   We went to the beach all day, which isn't a rarity for me, BUT it was with adults only.  I was able to relax and do the beach how I used to.  Instead of sand castles and umbrella time, I swam in the waves, had a beach drink and tried to nap.     I read more of my book than collect shells (but I still did both). 2.  I didn't drive the entire weekend. No car seat buckles and no kiddie snacks, no mediating and no toddler tunes.  Better yet, no pressure (safety, caution).  I left that to others.  Mostly to Meg for driving ...

Today I had just enough time to watch a grocery cart swiftly crash into my car.  Technically I had more than enough time to stop it.  In fact, it was kind of walking parallel to me, but then picked up speed and SMASH. The reason I couldn't stop it (even though it was bright green and headed for my shiny black car) was because I was holding 5 bags of groceries and two little people's hands. I went to the local grocery market so that the kids could both get their little carts and make a quick stop fun.  Ok fine, quick stops don't happen anymore, but they did have fun. I didn't want them bringing the carts in the parking lot, because that would be a disaster (both managed to tip them over in the store a total of three times). So I thought I could grab it all.  I didn't anticipate Lucy wanting to hold my left hand.  It was a really big deal to have the left hand - you know that one I had carefully balanced all the groceries on so I was frazzled when we walked ...

Bachelorette on far right! In a few days Amy and I (and others) are escaping to the Cape for a girl's weekend.  Let's call it what it is a bachelorette party ! We are celebrating an amazing friend, one who we've known for well over 20 years.  A fellow girl scout who is truly selfless - beautiful in every way imaginable.  We are hoping some giggles and booze will help the memories, stories and squabbles surface in fits of dance and instagram posts. I've been excited for this for a long time, but it just dawned on me tonight that it will be the first time that I will be away from kids by myself.  The few times I've been away (for weddings or dates) Jerry has always accompanied me.  We were in it together.  We missed them together and had fun together.  Once when I cried, Jerry told me how much I deserved a night away.  He was right and I tried really hard to have fun (and I did!). Jerry will be great.  Maybe part of him is glad to have ...