Teach Me How to Mommy

On this Memorial Day Weekend To the Men and Women who lost their lives protecting our Beloved Country, We are all VERY thankful for the BRAVE Men and Women who have served our country, and there are no words to describe the gratitude we feel knowing that these are the citizens who are braver than we are, the Men & Women who gave their lives so we can live free.  We are spending our weekend at the beach with our families, enjoying the cool weather, the parades, and the extra day for extra love. We know that we would not have the safety and the protection and peace of mind without you.  Today, we remember the fallen.  Thank you and we love you.  Amy & Colleen

This week one of my students raised his hands and announced that he never noticed (until today) that I have a wrinkle under my nose that surfaces when I smile. Wait, what? You've only been looking at me for 170 days, I've been looking at myself for 33 years.  I definitely don't have a wrinkle there; that's just weird. Wait, let me double-check. Goddammit he's right. And so even though I am on the "younger" end of the spectrum of teachers, the tides have clearly changed.  Students used to notice my new highlights, if I got a tan, perhaps even my jewelry.  Now, why yes, it's the revelation of new wrinkles and lines that will undoubtedly drive me mad. The picture below is "pre-wrinkle announcement" a time when I was at my happiest - Mother's Day.  It's also slightly blurry, which is purposeful. If you ever are ever wondering just where you stand, walk into a room of teens, you'll find out reallllllllllllll quick.

I wrote the below post on September 23, 2015.  I wrote it, and never read it again. It's embarrassing and feels vapid (Instagram, really Amy??? ughhh)  .... but  It was the first post I ever wrote for the blog, and also one I never intended on sharing.  It's really hard to tell the world, or even your best friend for that matter, that you are struggling.  It's even harder to admit that when you are trying to start a Mommy Blog.  I mean, honestly, truly, how dare I try and start a blog about trying to be a mom when I barely felt like I could get out of bed some days. That first year, and first summer were H.A.R.D.  The anxiety was overwhelming.  You can literally see it in my face in every single picture.... (or at least I can....)  Work was distracting, Pumping/Nursing was a daily (no HOURLY) struggle, and forget seeing my friends.... Once I was home, I was never leaving...  The anxiety of being a Mom (toppled with EVERYTHING ELSE) was...

Guest Post:  Alicia is a friend from high school who is a full-time working mom of one adorable boy, Cooper.  She's also building a make-up empire and blowing up Facebook with wildly entertaining videos and tutorials.  She makes everything look easy, which is why this blog is just that much more important.  Thanks for sharing Alicia. I was asked to write something MONTHS ago, and I promise, the commitment to put my thoughts on paper has never left my mind.  I’m embarrassed it took me this long.  But to be honest, I couldn’t get myself to write down my story, because if I did, it would somehow make my failures more real.  (Sure, I know we’re always the hardest on ourselves, and I know I’m not a failure, but the thoughts, “could I have done better…can I DO better?” constantly run through my mind.) Let me step back for a second.  It took my husband and I well over a year to get pregnant with Cooper.  Two heartbreaking miscarriages, lo...

Well, we've waited for it all year.  It's finally come!  It's Mother's Day! Even if Mother's Day means that the craft your kid made you at daycare has already broken and the outdoor barbecue you planned for your family will be slightly ruined tainted by pouring rain, it's still "our day." On Friday, I finished up a year long relationship with a student teacher.  The experience was such a positive one that I held back tears when I said, "good-bye" to her.  She helped me with all the taxing things that go on behind the scenes - grading, planning, copying, organizing, cleaning and the ever important report cards.  Beyond that, she became such an energetic and kind presence in my room.  She is a friend now and I will miss her dearly. She left me with a gift, that in her words, "defines who I am." I never received any of these "knit" things in my life.  I've always liked them, but isn't it kind of a lost ar...