What Self-Care...?

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Fueled on the adrenaline of having my third baby I powered through the first two weeks of postpartum like a true champion.  Kids need to be brought to school? Yup I'll do it.  Meals need to be prepped and warmed? Yup I'll do it.  Laundry? Cuddles? Reading? Breast feed the baby while doing all the above? Yup, I'm your girl.  What choice do I have anyways?

It's not that we didn't have help.  We had plenty and could've had a lot more had I asked.  The truth is I felt great after giving birth.  I was tired, but not exhausted.  My body started healing right away and sure I was uncomfortable, but functional.  Holly Jane even slept for me so each day I felt better and better.  I didn't see a reason for asking for help when I felt capable of doing it all.

 I guess I can too, but not without a cost.

Last Sunday I took the kids to the park because it felt like spring (a balmy 30 degrees).  While there I realized I felt like shit.  Honestly, really terrible.  My whole body hurt and I didn't feel like myself.  While John jumped into my arms he brushed against my chest and I felt sharp pains ripple through my body.  I felt awful, but I told the kids I wasn't myself and we should get home.


At home I realized I had a 103 fever.  Coupled with a boob that hurt even if you breathed on it, I realized I had mastitis.  Apparently it makes you feel like you have the flu and mine came out of nowhere.  After a quick Sunday night call and some meds I started to feel better, but it shook me.

Mastitis is a clogged milk duct.  I suppose they could just happen, but more likely it's because of poor self-care.  I don't mean hygiene, I mean not resting.  Failure to truly care for a healing body.  Also, perhaps not taking my time with the baby.  Gosh I know I even rushed some of her feedings - there was just so much to do.  Because I am pulled in some many directions I think it's clear that I wasn't doing a good job of any of those.

I am better now, but I am trying to focus on taking my time, especially with the baby.  She needs what she needs and in turn so do I.

When you are sick you can't help anyone, never mind the three kids, two pets and one husband I have.  So even though it goes against my nature I am trying to make sure that above all else I am watching out for myself.   For me this starts with a focus on sleep at night (not successful at the moment), a safe workout and not getting up while breastfeeding (EVER!).

What do you do to make sure you are loved throughout the day?

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